In our culture, the anal region as part of our sexuality was taboo, gay, or considered as advanced sex. Reports about the male G-spot and the corresponding stimulation of the prostate gland, quasi as intimate fitness against prostate problems, have reduced reservations in many men. Many men today experience a prostate massage as extremely stimulating, regardless of their sexual orientation. The prostate is very sensitive to touch and especially to pressure. Men who first time explore such stimulation describe it as very intense, more intense than a penile orgasm.
What is the prostate?
The prostate is a small walnut-shaped gland located just below the bladder. The general purpose of the prostate is to produce a fluid that transports sperm during ejaculation.
How do I find my prostate?
The best way to locate the prostate is first digitally (with your finger). With some lubricant, insert the finger into the anus. Move the finger towards the stomach and you should be able to feel a walnut-like gland. Do not be worried if you do not find it immediately. Every man is a little different and it can take some practice.
Giving yourself a prostate massage can be an acrobatic challenge. There are numerous prostate tools to create a solo experience. However, the intensity and the experience together with a partner cannot be compared.
What is a prostate massage?
The main purpose of prostate massage is to achieve orgasm. The prostate is often referred to as the “male G-spot”. Prostate stimulation can help improve the size and strength of the erection and increase the intensity of your orgasm (more than just normal penis stimulation).
It is difficult to describe. But the sensation is more intense than during a normal orgasm. The stimulation also builds up slowly, but it lasts longer and becomes more intense.
Preparation for a prostate massage
Fingernails should be trimmed and jewelry, such as rings, should be removed (no one wants to lose a family heirloom in their partner’s backside). In furthermore, the surface of the anus is sensitive and prone to injury.
Your fingers should not have any scratches or cuts. Even with proper preparation, all sex involves the transmission of bacteria, and this is even more likely to happen during anal play. I always use a latex glove (a condom around the finger is also sufficient).
Cleanliness and hygiene should be a matter of course for both partners.
The 6 phases of a prostate massage
1. Relax. Relax. Relax. The first time you do this, your sphincter muscle will have to get used to the fact that a “foreign object” will enter and the “direction of motion” will change and will feel unfamiliar. The muscle will tense or even cramp, even if it is only one finger. This should be possible. It is just messing with your head. That’s all. Take your time. Your partner should not start right away. Start with a gentle massage or anything that feels good.
You have to try out a posture that is comfortable for you. It should be relaxed and maybe not too acrobatic.
2. Make it slick and slippery. I use almond oil or silicone oil. The latter is very rich and doesn’t smell. First, massage the anus with your finger and penetrate gently until the sphincter relaxes.
3. First contact. You stimulate the prostate gland by gently applying pressure to the nearby rectal wall and walnut-like gland with your finger towards the abdominal wall in a circular motion. If it becomes too much, take it down a notch. Give your partner feedback from time to time.
4. Build up stimulation. The first signs that you are doing it right are slight “contractions” of your PC muscles and your sphincter – mostly involuntary. You will also notice a slight feeling of fullness and warmth in your rectum and surrounding pelvic area. Notice the increasing tension in the area of your prostate. The contractions behind the pubic bone increase. The feeling of warmth increases. It may feel strange and unfamiliar but stick with it.
5. Keep going. After a while, your body may start to shake. It is usually concentrated around the pelvic area and can radiate to the extremities. At this stage, it is important to continue and not to stop. Any change in pressure or pace can cause to lose the moment. Just let it happen.
6. The peak of emotions. The feeling of fullness and warmth around your rectum becomes more intense. And very unusual the first time. There is no need to wait for the orgasm. It will happen all by itself. With some practice, it is also possible to experience such an “anal orgasm” without touching the penis.
The first time you may not find the process and the feelings as pleasant as you expect. Most men have to get used to the new experience first. The second time around you will be much more relaxed and will not want to miss it.